ADVENTURES IN SITE TRACKING 6
SOMEHOW, LIFE GOES ON

The other day, I'm going through my Site Tracker and I find a link that leads me to this:

Linked Due to the Size of the Image

Uh, #1, I did visit from a referring link. Why on earth would I be typing URLs to a site I've never heard of before in my address bar? What, do you think people just do this randomly in hopes of finding something interesting? If I did, I get the feeling 3/4 times I'd end up at a porn site.

#2, why would you CARE if I found it by typing in the URL? Call me a cranky old cantankerous barracuda, but I really don't like being told how to surf the internet, thank you very much.

If this was all I had to report, this would be a very lame Site Tracking Adventure. So that's why that's not the end of it. Not at all indeed. Yesterday, I found this link in my referral reports:

Site Tracking Adventure #6, September 21, 2008

Kotaku once said that my site was pointless. If they saw that site, their heads would explode. Seriously. I couldn't make heads or tails of that site, and that page I linked is only the beginning.

#1. I can handle someone thinking my opinions on the NES game Athena are "foolish", but I'm especially happy that a picture of the game's boxart, a video of someone beating the first three levels, some unintelligible font, and a link to an article about ships being hijacked off Somalia explain exactly why they're foolish. Otherwise, I may have been in the dark for who knows how many years to come.

#2. Quote, "haha!! foolish mortal perceptions and opinions... ...but she's still a god". Okay. Who's still a god? Athena? Or me? Did I just get accused of being a west African pirate? And why would that make me a god? Well, I guess it would make sense... I mean, only a god would have the power to attack a ship halfway around the world from the confines of an Ohio apartment building.

#3. The rest of that site - Seriously, WTF?? No, really, what the hell?? It's gotta be one of those viral advertisement sites like those Levi's jeans ones from a few years back. That's the only thing that makes sense. Or doesn't...

Comments from the RAU Gallery:
Nucleo: Well, I don't know if that site makes any less sense than things do around here on a daily basis, but I digress.
Lizaki: Oh, I see you guys discovered the results of my last experiment...
Nucleo: Is that what that is? What kind of experiment were you administrating?
Lizaki: I hooked the spaghetti strainers up to a volunteer's head and they generated a website based on his deepest thoughts.
Nucleo: Lemme guess... Christopher Paladin?
Lizaki: No, mine. Though I was watching the movie Congo while playing the video game based on it at the same time, so maybe that had some minor influence on the results.

Christopher: Did someone say my name?
Lizaki: Yeah, wanna help contribute to science, young man?
Christopher: ...
Lizaki: ...
Christopher: ...
Lizaki: ...
Nucleo: ...
Christopher: ...
Lizaki: Geez, man, c'mon! Does it really take that long to decide? Yes or no?
Christopher: Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were talking to me. I sometimes forget I'm a man. LOL.
Lizaki: Shit. Okay, here goes. Just put this on your head...
Nucleo: This should be interesting...
Lizaki: In a few moments the deepest, the most intricate thoughts of Christopher Paladin will be known to all!
Christopher:

Nucleo: ...What the... bloody hell is that?
Lizaki: Fuck if I know.
Robin: Allright, everyone! You know what time it is, right?
Lizaki: The moment everyone actually puts up with the rest of this piffle to see?
Robin: Yup. The little magic hat has drawn the name of a cool cat with a dry sense of humor that you may or may not get.
Christopher: You got Magic Dick from the J. Geils Band?!
Robin: Nope. Better than that. You know him from his cameo appearance in the Honen's Vacation sketch. Roll it, Gordon!


THE RAU GALLERY PRESENTS:
Vampyrus's Greatest Hits


(If you'd like to set this to music, click above.)














































Nucleo: Hmm... Suddenly, I'm very hungry for a Boston Creme...
Christopher: Cat!!!
Lizaki: Admit it, kid. You just mentioned Magic Dick so there'd be yet another reference to the male body part in this series, didn't you?
Christopher: Another reference to what?
Lizaki: Ah, chickenshit. Never mind.

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