ADVENTURES IN SITE TRACKING #4
THE MORONIC MOTHERLODE!!


I am surprised this guy can even figure out how to get on the internet.

Really. It has to be read to be believed. There are so many things wrong there, I don't know where the best place to start is. So how about from the top:

1. First of all, he gets the URL to the site wrong and calls it "FlymingOmelette.com". Way to spellcheck, Wonderboy! WHY IS IT THAT PEOPLE WHO CRITICIZE THIS SITE AND ITS COMMUNITY IN GENERAL CAN NEVER GET OUR FUCKING NAMES RIGHT?!?!

2. He has no idea of the concept of a fansite and feels they are purposeless. However, without fansites like mine that have original content, blogs like his would not have anything to update about.

3. Here comes the REAL clincher! A lot of people don't find my "About FO" page and assume I'm male. Understandable. I'm female and have a tendency to assume people are male unless evidence shows otherwise, but this idiot actually FOUND the About FO page, SAW the pictures, and STILL assumes I'm male!!! He probably lives in a fallout shelter basement, has never seen a member of the opposite sex before, thinks they are a government conspiracy, and has a gun rack on his wall that would make Burt Gummer jealous.

4. He calls me a "furry" for no apparent reason. Just for the record, I'm not a furry and I have nothing against furries, but what the fuck would make anyone think that I am one? I'm not dressed in an animal costume in any of my pictures. My name, "Flying Omelette", does not imply an animal identity of any kind, unless you really, REALLY stretch and associate Omelette = Eggs = Chicken. But that's REALLY throwing stones at the moon.

5. He criticizes my artistic skills and says they haven't changed at all since I was 10. Okay, I know I'm not the best cartoonist in the world, but I've posted many, MANY side-by-side "then and now" comparisons of my characters and I don't think there's any doubt about it that the newer ones usually look better. Preston Abirok and Deuce Koma alone prove that.

6. He says I belong in a "Have You Seen Me Now" flyer. WTF??? That would seem to imply I've disappeared, when I post on my forums EVERY SINGLE DAY!!

Is this guy's problem that he needs glasses?? He sees my pictures and can't tell I'm a woman, and seems to be seeing fur where there is none. He can't tell the difference between the old versions of my characters and the new versions. And he can't find me on my forums. Oh, wait a minute, I think I know who the author of this blog is...

Well, that explains a lot. I'm not even going to bother going into how ridiculous some of the comments on that blog entry are because I figured I shouldn't really expect too much out of anyone who can get through that posting without realizing how extremely fucked-up it is. Hey, Mr. Gauger, the next time you want to leech my site's content to make yours appear to have some, here's what you can use:

Comments from the RAU Gallery:
Robin: You know, I'm starting to feel better about my demon form. Because I think I'm losing faith in humanity anyway.
Chance: I lost it long ago and I don't even have a demon form.
Honen: I think I'm going to lose my lunch.
Wildclaw: Hey, man! You call me "furry", I show you all 9 of my kitty nipples, man!
Honen: What ze hell?? You told me you had eight!
Wildclaw: Certain discoveries have been made since then, amigo.
Honen: I don't want to know about them.
Nucleo: It does sound to me like this person is vision-impaired. Thank goodness Aurora figured out early on that's what my learning problem was.
Preston: Well, if it's glasses he needs, he can have my old ones.
Chance: For crying out loud, Preston, you've done that joke about 4 times now. NO ONE wants your old glasses!
Preston: But I really don't like having them around. Bad reminder of what I used to look like in the 80's (which this person seems to think I still look like...)
Chance: It's called a garbage can. Just throw them away.
Preston: And waste a perfectly good pair of glasses?
Chance: They can't be that good if they were giving you headaches.
Lukyan: Oh, MAN!!!!
Preston: Oh, what is your problem THIS time? I mentioned that old version of me, but I refrained from posting the pictures. Don't tell me I can't even talk about it without you throwing a fit.
Lukyan: No, it's not that. I'm just completley blown away by the fact that we actually managed to find someone dumber than Chester.
Chance: That's not too difficult on the internet.
Robin: Okay, that's enough, Lukyan. Chester may be a little slow, I admit, but he's at least got good grammar, excellent mechanical skills, and knows a woman when he sees one (and knows how to treat them).
Lukyan: Okay, okay, sorry. No need to turn this into "As the RAU Turns".
Christopher: SOAP OPERA!!
Nucleo: Uh, not quite, Christopher. I think the situation is under control.
Christopher: No...Crow's singing in the shower again!
Nucleo:
Chance:
Preston:
Lukyan:
Robin:
Honen:
Wildclaw: Everyone who values their eardrums, vamoose, man!!
Zumo: ....

Damn Burt Gummer! Spreading more of his anti-giant worm propaganda, I see.

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